- Clean the styrofoam bits off the surface and rub with alcohol.
- Freak out about paint choices.
- Attempt to scuff surface with fine sandpaper.
- Do another alcohol rub.
- Get sandpaper grit all over forearms while leaning to reach keyboard to type steps 1-5.
- Put on Thoroughly Modern Millie soundtrack.
- Bite the bullet and mix Plaid Apple Barrel Colors Craft Paint in Pure Silver with DecoArt Multi-Purpose Sealer, then apply with a sponge brush.
- Repeat step 7, only more so.
- Enjoy the streaky effect.
- Wonder how flexible the "Let dry 1 hour" instruction is.
- Take 5 minutes to type steps 6-10, then touch the paint to see if it's dry.
- Attempt to fix fingerprint with brush; decide surface is dry enough for a second coat anyway.
- Make a mental note to do all future painting projects on a rotating stand.
- Wonder why paint won't stick to this one st*pid spot.
- Wonder if continually spinning the lazy susan as in the picture in step 13 would aid the drying process.
- Resist urge to touch second coat.
- Paint coat three with happily-opaque results.
- Realize you're leaning over your project to reach the keyboard; put on painting shirt.
- Mix more paint-n-sealer.
- Appreciate the freedom to wipe a drip of sealer purposely right on your shirt...then hope it doesn't seep through onto nursing bra.
- Paint coat four.
- Debate what to paint on finished surface: swirls using dabs of paint and a static brush on a rotating surface? Taped-off geometric shapes? Freehand painted designs? A quote?
- Wonder whether just to use more sealer on top of finished piece or Anita's Water Clean-Up Polyurethane.
- Paint coat five. Resist urge to pour paint on top of surface and just spread it around.
- Hear baby wake up and cry. Push chair back to leave office. Hear toddler tenderly comfort baby with by shouting, "Perrin-Perrin-bo-berrin! Banana-fana-fo-ferrin!"
- Dip sleeve in paint on edge of surface by typing from new, pushed-back position.
- Attempt to fix dipped area.
- Fix attempted fix from step 27.
- Try to clean-up paint on edges by spinning the lazy susan against the brush, thereby creating a raised edge of paint on top of surface.
- Try wiping off new raised edge; spoil entire surface edge; fix new ickies with coat 5.1.
- Discover paint underneath surface of lazy susan (AKA stabilizing place to put fingers).
- Leave office to check on baby, show silver fingertips to toddler, and get mini dark chocolate Reese's cup. Close door to prevent kitty participation.
- Realize it has been the length of Monsters Inc. plus both shorts. Forgo chocolate and nurse baby.
This post originally appeared on my family blog and is reprinted with permission.
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